Naturally beautiful

Recently I had a discussion with one of my close guy friends and he expressed the love he had for black women. I was a little shocked because that isn't something i hear often. Most black men i know either express how they don’t like black women or say things that imply it. Our discussion then led to why black men don’t like black females, and while we listed many reasons as to why this was true, I still couldn’t put my finger on it until he said " Guys are afraid to be with girls who do not fit the standard to societies eye of good looking because they are insecure”. When he said this is to me I had to let it sit. I thought about it and reflected on all the comments made by my black guy friends toward black women; expressing how they didn’t like black women with natural hair, short hair, or women who were too dark or too tall. It then led me to think about the whole idea of what beauty is. Men don’t want to be associated with anything that isn’t beautiful because then it makes them insecure. It is said that Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but the beholder is society; and the society we in live in is based on a white mans perception.  As an African American woman, I understand the struggles of all other African American women. We do things to fit into societies idea of beauty because what we look like naturally doesn’t fit. We perm our hair, we use bleaching cream, we start talking a certain way around certain people because we too like any other women wants to be considered beautiful.  “Women get their insecurities from guys who are insecure themselves”. Insecurities cause a dent in our confidence. Be Confident. Love who you are because if you give anyone else the power over your confidence level, then you are giving them power over your happiness. You are not your hair, or your skin, or your height. You are beyond that. You are naturally beautiful.